5 Cars to get Naughty In

Recently, a minister announced that we do not need much space to have sex. Being in different cars on different days of the week has endowed me the special powers of spatial awareness. Today, we look at a few cars we have recently reviewed which we find ideal to get jiggy in.

Opel Astra 1.0 Easytronic

The engine of this car is a frugal 1.0 3 cyl, with a tiny turbo charger, giving you a punchy enough 103bhp and a maximum of 170Nm of torque. Mated to a 5-speed automated manual, what better way to get there, then with such an engaging drive to get the heart pumping?

With an extendable boot area of 370 litres to 1210 litres, there is quite the bit of room to snuggle up in. Unfortunately, utility space is marred by a dip in the boot well, which on normal days, gives that little more useful space, but when in the mood, beware of a possible backache.

A little plus, is Opel’s optional air freshening diffuser to get you in the mood. Be it when you are coming or going, this car keeps you in your “Zen” moment!

Opel Astra Sports Tourer 1.4 Turbo

If the hatch version of the Astra isn’t enough for you, there is the option of more rear-end space. The Opel Astra Sports Tourer 1.4 Turbo might be your thing.

Providing more space by way of the estate rear, cargo space is 540 litres, and is extendable to 1,630 litres of woohoo. You also get a flat loading floorboard, which lets you roll out that mattress.

Door-moulded bottle holders are available for you to place a cool-me-down drink, or whatever else that may make your moment extra special.

Audi Q7 2.0 TFSI

Ever felt like you needed to be away from prying eyes of that car just next to you? The Audi Q7 might be your answer.

The 252bhp 2.0 brings you to your location in comfort. Towering at 1,783mm, this SUV may seat 7 during the day, but at night, when the moon goes up and the seats go down, you can transform the Q7 into that ultimate love nest. The back row is fully automated, while the middle row lowers with a quick pull of a few levers, revealing a full 1,955mm of room to do the deed.

The rear air-conditioning vents mean that you will be kept cool when things are hot and sweaty. While having said that, there are cup holders in place just beside you for your cold drinks. Minimum interior width is at 1,159mm… The Audi just makes sense with more room. Ménage à trois anyone?

Hyundai Elantra 1.6 Elite

The Hyundai Elantra 1.6 Elite is the Korean company’s answer to the compact sized sedan. Equipped with a smart boot option where it opens automatically when it detects that the key is very near the boot… Ok never mind, bad idea.

Volkswagen Touran Comfortline 1.4TSI

Our recent test with the “Happy Dad Compact MPV” revealed a car that was as good for the extended family and now equally good for a discreet lil romp. As our BTO flats are getting smaller, with the kids and grandparents in the living room, the current-day thin walls make it harder to get it on in silence. Now now, who wants something silent when you need a little bit of noise to spice things up.

That’s where the Touran comes into the picture! Folding the middle and back rows of the 7-seater down gives you 1,857 litres! Rear air-conditioning vents provide comfort while the panoramic sunroof gives a full view of the night sky while mom and dad get on with it.

The Best Car We Might Say?

Volkswagen Touran Comfortline 1.4TSI, and why?

Well, with a frugal but good performing engine, and great handling virtues, the Touran delivers where it counts most, during the drive. Where utility space is required, be it groceries for the weekend, or going to the beach, there is plenty of flexibility, even for such a small package, its not the size, but how you use it.

Furthermore, the panoramic sunroof works best when you are lying on your back. Ahh yes, German logic!

This car, my friends, gets a standing ovation from me… Even when I am seated in the drivers seat.

Remember friends, “You do not need much space to have sex”.